>>> ANYBODY CAN SAY SOMETHING THAT CAN GET A LAUGH.
BUT SAY SOMETHING CLEAN AND GET A LAUGH, THAT REQUIRES A
COMEDIAN. >> I HAVE ENOUGH KIDS, EVEN
MORMONS ARE LIKE, YOU SHOULD SETTLE DOWN.
>> THEY DON'T LIKE THE TITLE CLEAN COMEDIAN.
IT COMES DOWN TO WHETHER SOMEONE IS FUNNY OR NOT.
>> YOU'VE EVER BEEN RUNNING TO AN ELEVATOR, THEY SEE YOU
RUNNING, THEY JUST STAND THERE. >> IT'S NOT THAT CLEAN COMEDIANS
ARE MORE CLEVER OR THOUGHTFUL, IT'S A DIFFERENT APPROACH.
>> WHAT ARE YOU IN FOR? >> I USED TO GET THE ROLLING OF
THE EYES, THE CLEAN COMIC. >> ONE OF THE HIGHEST FORMS OF
COMEDY WHEN YOU CAN BE CLEAN AND JUST AS FUNNY AS THE DIRTY
COMICS. >> MY JOB IS TO MAKE YOU LAUGH,
NOT TO OFFEND YOU. >> HERE'S YOUR SIGN.
>> JUST BE FUNNY. THAT'S ALL.
TO MY MIND WHEN I HEAR THE TERM CLEAN COMEDY IS GOD, NO.
THEN I REMEMBER, NO, THERE'S CLEAN COMEDY I REALLY LIKE.
LEFT-HANDED PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE THAT THE WORD LEFT IS SO OFTEN
ASSOCIATED WITH NEGATIVE THINGS. LEFT-HANDED COMPLIMENT, WHAT ARE
WE HAVING FOR DINNER, LEFTOVERS? YOU GO TO A PARTY, THERE'S
NOBODY THERE, WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO?
THEY LEFT. >> MOST CLEAR COMEDY, I HEAR
BORING. TELL ME -- LET ME DECIDE WHEN I
WATCH HIM. >> THERE IS THE VEGETARIAN HOT
POCKET FOR THOSE OF US WHO DON'T WANT TO EAT MEAT, BUT STILL
WOULD LIKE DIARRHEA. >> NO SWEARING, AND NOTHING THAT
IS WHAT I CONSIDER OFFENSIVE. >> THERE IS A STANDARD THAT SAYS
YOU CAN TRUST ME WITH YOUR AUDIENCE, WE'RE NOT GOING TO
JUST THROW IT ALL OUT THERE AND BE OFFENSIVE WITH EVERY TOPIC
THERE IS OUT THERE. WE'RE GOING TO MAKE YOU ALL
COMFORTABLE WHEN YOU LEAVE SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO TAKE A SHOWER
WHEN THIS IS OVER. >> IF YOU'RE WORKING TELEVISION
SITS ON TOP OF YOUR NON-WORKING TELEVISION, YOU MIGHT BE A RED
NECK. >> IT'S NOT A BAD THING FOR A
FAMILY TO BE ABLE TO SEE A COMEDY.
IT MAKES THEM ACCESSIBLE, AND AVAILABLE TO A BROADER MARKET.
>> I READ RECENTLY, KIM JONG-UN IS CONSIDERING OUTLAWING SARCASM
IN NORTH KOREA. WOW.
I WONDER IF HE PROPOSED THAT TO HIS TEAM AND ONE OF HIS GENERALS
SAID, YEAH, THAT WILL WORK. >> PROBABLY THE BEST COMEDIAN
WHO HAPPENS TO BE CLEAN IS BRIAN REGAN.
WHEN HE WOULD GET DONE WITH HIS SHOW NO ONE IN THE AUDIENCE IS
LIKE, I CAN'T BELIEVE HE DIDN'T CURSE.
HE IS CLEAN NOT BECAUSE HE DID IT FOR CORPORATE MONEY, OR TO BE
MORE APPEALING FOR TELEVISION. HE DID IT BECAUSE HIS SENSE OF
HUMOR RINGS CLEAN. SO WE WANT BRIAN REGAN TO BE
CLEAN. ALTHOUGH IT WOULD BE FUNNY TO
SEE HIM GO OFF THE RAILS. JUST GET HIM DRUNK.
>> SOME LAW FIRMS DEAL WITH DUI, THEN AGGRAVATED DUI.
YOU KNOW WHAT I PULLED YOU OVER? >> YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW WHY YOU
PULLED ME OVER. >> HERE'S THE THING ABOUT REGAN,
DESPITE SOMEONE NOT CUSSING, IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU CAN'T
SENSE THAT THERE'S AN EDGE. HE IS QUINTESSENTIAL, EVERY
COMEDIAN, HE IS THEIR FAVORITE. YOU MOM NIGHT NEVER HAVE HEARD
OF HIM, BUT HE WOULD BE HER FAVORITE TOO.
>> DING DING DING, YEAH. >> THAT'S NORMALLY THE SIGN OF A
CLEAN COMEDIAN, ONE THAT THE AUDIENCE WANTS TO EMBRACE.
>> I HAD A MASSAGE TODAY, MY FIRST ONE.
HE TRIED TO RELAX ME. HE PLAYED MUSIC, A LITTLE
AGGRAVATING, THE TROMBONE KEPT HITTING ME IN THE HEAD.
I THINK IT WAS A TROMBONE. PRETTY SURE.
>> NEVER MET A PERSON WHO DOESN'T LIKE ELLEN.
IT'S A GIFT FROM GOD TO BE LIKABLE BY EVERYBODY.
SHE'S ALMOST LIKE A LOLLIPOP. I'VE NEVER MET NOBODY, NOBODY
SAYS I HATE LOLLIPOPS. >> YOU'RE WALKING DOWN THE
STREET, GOOD DAY FOR YOU, TOO, GOOD SELF-ESTEEM DAY, HAPPY WITH
YOUR OUTFIT, IT TAKES THE ONE TINY TRIP TO SUCK THE COOLNESS
OUT OF YOU. >> SHE'S GOT THAT JOKE WHEN
YOU'RE WATCHING AND YOU TRIP AND YOU LOOK AROUND TO MAKE SURE
NOBODY SAW YOU AND YOU DO THIS WHOLE PERFORMANCE FOR SOMEONE
WHO MIGHT HAVE SEEN YOU 50 YARDS AWAY WHERE YOU LOOK TO SEE WHAT
YOU COULD HAVE TRIPPED ON. IT'S SO SPECIFIC, YET SO
UNIVERSAL. YOU'RE NEVER THINKING THAT WAS A
CLEAN SHOW, YOU'RE JUST THINKING I LAUGHED SO HARD, MY STOMACH
HURTS, MY CHEEKBONES HURT. >> COMEDIANS ONLY WANT ONE
ADJECTIVE, FUNNY. EMOW COMEDIAN, GAY COMEDIAN,
ETHNIC COMEDIAN, THE FUNNIEST, WHEELCHAIR BOUND
COMEDIAN, NO ONE WANTS THAT, THEY JUST WANT FUNNY.
>> THE LAST COUPLE YEARS I'VE REFERRED TO BILL COSBY AS THE
ARTIST FORMERLY KNOWN AS BILL COSBY.
IT GIVES ME A WAY TO GO, YEAH, I KNOW, I KNOW.
>> PULLS OUT A NEEDLE. THIS IS TO DEADEN THE PAIN.
>> HE TAKES A BREATH BETWEEN BITS.
HE'S GOT THE PATIENCE TO WAIT, AND KNOW IT'S GOING TO BE FINE
WHEN YOU GET TO THE END. >> YOUR FACE, WHAT'S A MATTER
WITH YOU? >> OF THE TOP TEN COMEDIANS OF
ALL TIME, ONE WAS BILL COSBY. HIS ACT ON STAGE, CLEAN, HIS ACT
OFFSTAGE, FILTHY. ONE OF THE REASONS WHY THE
DIRTY/CLEAN THING IS SO COMPELLING WHAT'S BEHIND THAT
ISSUE IS AUTHENTICITY. I WANT THE COMEDIAN TO BE WHAT
THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE. AT A CERTAIN POINT THE AUDIENCE
TELLS YOU WE DON'T LIKE THAT AND THEN YOU HAVE A HINT OF
YOURSELF. WE LIKE THAT.
WE'RE HEADING TO YOGA, MY WIFE SAYS, WAIT FOR ME, I'M NOT
READY. IT'S ALL JUST TRYING NOT TO PART
WHILE STRETCHING. >> COMICS, WHAT'S YOUR POINT OF
VIEW, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?
IT SHOULD BE ABLE TO BE EXPLAINED.
THEY SHOULD KNOW IT. >> MY DAD WOULD ALWAYS COMPARE
ME TO FAMOUS PEOPLE. IT WAS HORNL.
PRESIDENTS, THAT WAS HISFAVORITE THING.
YOU KNOW, LOUIE, WHEN LINCOLN WAS YOUR AGE, HE WALKED 20 MILES
TO SCHOOL EVERY DAY, CHOPPED WOOD.
>> YEAH, DAD, BUT WHEN HE WAS YOUR AGE, HE WAS PRESIDENT.
>> A LOT OF COMEDIANS I LIKE, IT'S THE CLOSER THEY GET TO WHO
THEY ARE. ON STAGE, IS WHAT MAKES IT
INTERESTING. >> EVERYWHERE I GO, AS SOON AS I
CHECK INTO MY HOTEL ROOM, I IMMEDIATELY HANG THE DO NOT
DISTURB SIGN ON THE DOOR, OR FOR THE SPANISH SPEAKING, NO
MOLESTE. THERE'S NO DECISION WHERE I
THOUGHT, I'M GOING TO BE A CLEAN COMEDIAN.
THAT WAS KIND OF A CREEPY FEELING.
HANGING THAT ON MY DOOR BEFORE BED.
>> I JUST WROTE JOKES, AND I DIDN'T GET PLEASURE OUT OF USING
VULGARITY OR CURSING. >> I'M PISSED, I'M ANG RAY, AND
I'M CRAZIER THAN ANYBODY IN THE ROOM.
>> GO **** YOURSELF. I STUMBLED INTO THAT CONCEIT
STAGE IN PART BECAUSE OF PROTECTION BUT IN PART THAT'S
WHERE IT CAME FROM, DISCOVERING MY VOICE, THAT I'M FUNNIEST WHEN
I'M ANGRY. >> THE LITTLE BITCHES, THAT
DROVE ME IN THAT DIRECTION. >> NEXT WEEK I'M GOING TO HAVE
AN MRI TO FIND OUT WHETHER OR NOT I HAVE CLAUSTROPHOBIA.
>> IT HAS TO DO WITH A MESSENGER DELIVERING THE JOKE, NOT
NECESSARILY THE JOKE. WHOEVER THE MESSENGER OF THE
COMEDY IS, AS LONG AS IT'S AUTHENTIC AND REAL TO THEM, IT
WILL BE AUTHENTIC AND REAL TO US.
>> I WROTE ONE NEW JOKE SINCE MY TWINS WERE BORN.
IS THIS FUNNY? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS?
>> HI, HI, EVERYBO
>>> RED, THIS CAN'T GO ON. >> WHY?
>> I LOVE MY WIFE. I'VE NEVER LOVED ANYBODY ELSE.
WE WERE SWEETHEARTS SINCE WE WERE KIDS.
>> SHE DOESN'T NEED TO KNOW ABOUT US.
>> BACK AS EARLY AS THE 1920s, PEOPLE WERE SAYING HOLLYWOOD WAS
THE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE DECAYING MORALITY OF THE
COUNTRY. >> AND THEN BASICALLY HOLLYWOOD
SAID, YOU KNOW WHAT, STAY AWAY, HERE'S WHAT WE'LL DO.
WE'LL GOVERN OURSELVES. >> THE HISTORY OF COMEDY, UNTIL
RECENT TIMES, WAS ABOUT COMEDIANS TRYING TO GET AS CLOSE
TO THAT PROFANE WORLD AS THEY COULD WITHOUT GETS ARRESTED.
>> WC FIELDS, AN ORENRY GUY, FOUND A GREAT WAY TO SWEAR
WITHOUT SWEARING, HE WOULD SAY DRAT.
WHEN HE SAID DRAT, YOU KNEW WHAT HE WAS SAYING, HE'D SAY GOD FREE
DANIEL, THAT WAS LIKE GODDAMNIT. >> SO THE RULES WERE ARCHAIC BY
THE TIME TELEVISION CAME IN. THOSE RULES REMAINED, LARGELY,
YOU COULDN'T REFER TO SEX, YOU COULDN'T SWEAR.
>> WE'LL WRITE DOWN EVERYTHING THAT YOU DO DURING THE DAY, AND
WE'LL ALLOW SO MUCH TIME FOR EACH THING.
TEN MINUTES FOR THIS, 15 MINUTES FOR THAT.
>> I'M GOING TO NEED MORE THAN 15 MINUTES FOR THAT.
>> SEXUAL INNUENDO IS SAYING IT WITHOUT SAYING IT.
THERE WERE JUST THESE RIDICULOUS WAYS TO TRY TO TITILLATE THE
AUDIENCE WITH SOMETHING THAT ALMOST WAS SEXUAL.
>> JACK, I WANT TO FLY WITH YOU.
>> WHERE? >> YOU MEAN WANT TO --
FLY. THAT'S --.
>> WHAT DO YOU SAY? IS IT TIME FOR TAKEOFF?
>> THERE'S DIFFERENT STRATEGIES WRITERS USE TO TRY TO SNEAK
TABOO MATERIAL IN. >> THERE'S AN EPISODE WHERE A
TERM KEBABES WERE USED AS A GENITALIA REFERENCE.
SHE. >> NICE CATITS.
>> YOU CAN SAY CATITS, THAT'S NOT A WORD.
THAT, TO ME IS A WONDERFUL EXAMPLE OF GOING AROUND THE
THING YOU CAN'T SAY, NOT ONLY WAS IT FUNNIER, IT WAS TEN TIMES
FUNNIER. >> FIGURING OUT HOW TO GET
AROUND THE RULES SPAWNS EVEN BETTER COMEDY.
LIKE SEINFELD TO ME WAS THE ULTIMATE GETTING AROUND THE
SENSORS AND POINTED JOKES, TERMS FOR THINGS THAT WERE SEXUAL, YOU
KNOW, SHRINKAGE. >> I THINK THAT YOU THINK THAT A
CERTAIN SOMETHING IS NOT ALL THAT IT COULD BE.
WHEN, IN FACT, IT IS ALL THAT IT SHOULD BE AND MORE.
>> SEINFELD, THEY WERE THE MASTER OF EUPHEMISMS.
>> SHRINKAGE IS REALLY WHAT IT IS THOUGH, THAT'S TECHNICALLY
CORRECT. >> IT SHRINKS?
>> ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT LARRY DAVID AND JERRY SEINFELD
WAS THEIR LOVE OF LANGUAGE. THEY HAD A MASTERY THAT ENABLED
THEM TO COME UP WITH CLEVER SOLUTIONS TO CENSORSHIPS.
>> I WANT TO BE IN ON THIS TOO. >> NO, NO, NO.
>> WHY? WHAT, WHY?
>> BECAUSE YOU'RE A WOMAN. >> SO WHAT?
>> IT'S EASIER FOR A WOMAN NOT TO DO IT THAN A MAN.
WE HAVE TO DO IT, IT'S PART OF OUR LIFESTYLE.
>> JERRY WAS THE ONE WHO FIRST SAID WE CANNOT MENTION THE WORD
MASTURBATION OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT.
EVERYTHING HAS TO BE ALLUDED TO. >> YES, I AM MASTER OF MY
DOMAIN. >> I WAS REALLY PREPARED TO --
WITH THE SHOW, NBC DIDN'T DO IT. >> YOU'RE NOT DOING THE SHOW,
WELL, **** YOU, I'M DONE. WE ALL GOT TO THE OFFICE, AND
SAID HEY, THIS IS GREAT, WHAT, YEAH, WELL.
>> WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? >> THERE'S A NAKED WOMAN ACROSS
THE STREET. >> THIS IS GOING TO BE THE
EASIEST MONEY I'VE EVER MADE IN MY LIFE.
>> I'M OUT. >> THEY BRILLIANTLY FIGURED HOW
TO GET THAT PAST THE SENSORS IN A WAY THAT EVERYBODY KNEW WHAT
WAS BEING TALKED ABOUT. >> WE TORTURED THE SENSORS, "IN
LIVING COLOR," HALF THE TIME THEY DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT WE
WERE TALKING ABOUT. >> ALLOW ME TO -- MYSELF.
>> WE USED TO PUT WHAT WE CALLED DECOYS INTO OUR SCRIPTS, THINGS
SO OUTRAGEOUS, THEY'D SAY YOU CAN'T DO THAT, AT LEAST GIVE US
THIS, THE THING WE REALLY WANTED.
>> LET ME BE VENEREAL IN MY REQUISITION FOR THE BODY OF THIS
CONGREGATION AS THE GREEK PHILOSOPHER -- I LICKIS MY
PROBISCUS. >> IT'S BARGAINING, TWO BALLS
FOR ONE VAGINA. >> WHAT DO YOU THINK?
>> I THINK YOU MADE A VAGINA. >> YOU START NEGOTIATE BEING
THEM FOR WHAT YOU CAN AND CAN'T HAVE.
>> YOU THINK MY VAGINA HAS CURTAINS.
>> I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG IT'S BEEN.
>> TWO BROKE GIRLS WAS TRYING TO MAKE A TV SHOW THAT MOVES THE
NEEDLE AND CHANGES MINDS AND YOU CAN'T DO THAT BY PLAYING SAFE,
PURE AND SIMPLE, BUT IT'S THEIR JOB TO KEEP THEIR JOB AND IT'S
MY JOB TO PUSH THE ENVELOPE. >> EXCUSE ME, WHERE'S THEY MY
WAITRESS? >> SHE'S COMING.
>> AND IT'S THIS. AND IT'S THIS.
>> MODERN FAMILY GOT TO WRITE THE EPISODE WHERE THE LADY IS
SAYING ****, BUT SHE WAS SAYING FUDGE.
IT'S GETTING BLEEPED. ****.
BUT IT WAS ABOUT THE WORDS. WE WERE ABLE TO MAKE THE CASE IN
THE CENTRAL PART OF THE EPISODE. ****.
>> I HAVE TWO CHILDREN. >> SO THERE'S A WEIRD THING ON
BROADCAST TELEVISION WHERE YOU TRY TO FORGET THAT IT'S NOT ART,
AND THAT IT'S A BUSINESS, BUT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE YOU'RE
REMINDED THAT THERE'S STILL PEOPLE WHO PUT MONEY INTO THIS
THAT KEEP US ON THE AIR AND THEY HAVE A SAY AND THAT'S WHY WE
CAN'T SAY **** MORE THAN FOUR TIMES.
>> THIS IS BULL [ >>> YOU WERE FAMILY FRIENDLY,
RIGHT, YOU DO NOT USE WEIRD LANGUAGE, A CLEAN ACT.
>> IF I'M TALKING ABOUT TAKING NAPS OR MINI MUFFINS, DO YOU
REALLY NEED TO THROW AN "F" BOMB IN THERE.
>> KALE IS A SUPER FOOD, IT'S SPECIAL POWER IS TASTING BAD.
YOU CAN FIND OUT IT CURES CANCER, AND I'D BE LIKE I'M
GOING TO DO THE CHEMO, ALL RIGHT.
>> AS COMEDIANS, THERE WAS THIS SAYING THAT TAKES YOU TEN YEARS
TO FIND YOUR VOICE. I WENT THROUGH PERIODS WHERE I
WAS SMOKING ON STAGE. I WAS ENERGETIC.
I WAS POLITICAL. BUT IT WASN'T NECESSARILY
AUTHENTIC TO WHO I WAS. >> JIM GAFFIGAN PAINTS AN
AMAZING PICTURE. AND IF YOU INSERT A SWEAR IN
THERE, IT JUST DILUTES THE WHOLE BEAUTY OF THE PAINTING.
>> THERE'S PRESSURE TO ENJOY SUMMER, RIGHT, I'M FROM THE
MIDWEST, IT'S ALMOST A PANIC. GO OUT THERE, HAVE FUN, WINTER
IS COMING TO KILL US. GO GET SKIN CANCER NOW.
>> HE'S ALWAYS GOING TO GIVE YOU A DIFFERENT TAKE.
LIKE, FINDING A GOLD COIN ON THE BEACH WHERE MILLIONS OF PEOPLE
HAVE WALKED BY IT AND ALL THE SUDDEN HE JUST SEES IT.
IT WAS JUST RIGHT THERE. HE HAS THAT ABILITY.
GOD DAMN YOU, GAFFIGAN. >> WE'RE NEVER READY FOR THE
SEASONS OF CHANGE, IN OCTOBER WE'RE CAUGHT OFF GUARD, IT'S
GETTING COLD, WHAT IS THIS, EVERY YEAR NOW?
>> HE REALLY WORKS HARD TO GET ALL THE FUNNY OUT OF THE JOKE.
LIKE HE REALLY IS LIKE WRINGING THE FUNNY OUT.
>> HOW MANY JOKES ABOUT SEASONS DOES THIS GUY HAVE?
>> I CAME HOME THE OTHER DAY I WAS HELPING MY WIFE FOLD
CLOTHES, A LITTLE PAIR OF SKIMPY UNDERWEAR, I LOOKED AT MY WIFE
AND I SAID, WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO WEAR THESE FOR ME, SHE SAID I
CAN'T, THEY'RE YOUR DAUGHTER'S. NO, NO, NO.
>> I CAN DROP AN "F" BOMB, AND I'LL GET A LAUGH, BUT I THINK
PEOPLE APPRECIATE WHEN YOU'VE TAKEN THE TIME TO REALLY THINK A
BIT THROUGH AND HOW CAN I DO THIS AND WALK THAT LINE?
AS WE ALL KNOW, IF YOU'VE EVER DROPPED A BANK SAFE ON YOUR FOOT
THERE ARE TIMES WHEN PROFANITY IS THE RIGHT TOOL AT THE RIGHT
TIME. BUT IT'S OFTEN A CRUTCH.
>> HEY -- >> THERE'S NO DOUBT THAT I DON'T
NEED TO BE THROWING THE "F" BOMBS AS MUCH AS I DO.
>> YOU STUPID ****. I HATE TO SIDE WITH MY MOTHER
AND GRANDMOTHER AND MY WIFE, BUT SOMETIMES IT'S JUST BECAUSE I'M
LAZY. >> AS AN ARTIST, YOU CAN TELL
WHEN PEOPLE ARE BEING LAZY AND USING IT AS A CRUTCH.
BUT THERE'S AN ART TO IT. >> I HAD A GUY COME TO ME ONE
DAY AND TELL ME ABOUT -- WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE POSITION?
I SAID, WELL, IT DEPENDS ON THE SIZE OF****, MY POSITION IS
WITH ANOTHER MOTHER ****. >> THIS ISN'T MAJOR LEAGUE
BASEBALL. I'M HERE TO CHEAT.
YOU SAY I LOVE YOUR MOTHER **** ASS, I SAID, DAD, TELL
ME, CUSSING SAVES THE SOUL. THAT HE SHOULD START CUSSING IN
CHURCHES, IT WOULD SAVE A LOT OF SOULS.
>> PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR SINBAD.
>> I WAS DIRLYTY WHEN I STARTED. A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T KNOW.
I WAS DIRTY WHEN I STARTED. I SOUNDED LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.
I SAID I WONDER IF I COULD CLEAN IT UP, AND THEN PICK UP, AND I
DID. >> PEOPLE ACT LIKE THEY AIN'T
NEVER BEEN IN McDONALD'S, GOT THE SAME MENU, YOU GUYS ARE
GOING, GIVE ME, LET ME SEE IF YOU HAVE, YOU KNOW
WHAT THEY GOT. >> I DON'T CARE HOW YOU DO IT,
IF THAT JOKE DOESN'T WORK WITHOUT THE CUSS WORDS, IT'S NOT
A JOKE. IT SHOULD BE ABLE TO SWING BOTH
WAYS. IF YOU COULD SWING IT THROUGH
BOTH WAYS, YOU GOT YOURSELF A JOKE, A ROUTINE.
>> THOSE COMEDIANS WHO DON'T RELY IN BLUE COMEDY, THEY RELY
ON THEIR WORDS AND THE PUNCH LINES AND THE DELIVERIES.
>> PLEASE WELCOME JERRY STEIN STEINFELD.
>> JERRY SEINFELD. >> WHAT'S THE THING WITH THE
POST OFFICE WITH THE WANTED POSTERS ON THE WALLS?
MY MIN QUESTION WITH THE WANTED POSTERS ON THE WALL, WHY DIDN'T
THEY HANK ONTO THIS GUY WHEN THEY TOOK HIS PICTURE?
>> SEINFELD WAS THE MASTER OF THE MINUTIA OF LIFE, THE MORE
SPECIFIC HE CAN BE, THE BETTER. A WRITTENTURE CRAFTSMAN.
>> LIGHT, CEREAL, THAT WAS A BALSY NAME, I THAULSALWAYS THOUG
LIFE. SQUARIES, IT'S MUCH BIGGER THAN
THAT. THIS IS LIFE, I TELL YOU.
>> JERRY SEINFELD IS TECHNICALLY AND WORKWISE, THE GREATEST
COMEDIAN, SOMEONE WHO REALLY CARES ABOUT THE STRUCTURE OF A
JOKE. >> I SAW A STUDY THAT SAID
SPEAKING IN FRONT OF A CROWD HAS BECOME THE NUMBER ONE FEAR OF
THE AVERAGE PERSON. I FOUND THAT AMAZING.
NUMBER TWO WAS DEATH. TO THE AVERAGE PERSON, IF YOU
HAVE TO BE AT A FUNERAL, YOU WOULD RATHER BE IN THE CASKET
THAN DOING THE EULOGY. >> SEINFELD, GAFFIGAN, REGAN,
THEY INSPIRE OTHERS TO TRY IT AS A CHALLENGE.
FUNNY WITHOUT TALKING ABOUT ANYTHING THAT WOULD OFFEND THEIR
MOTHER. >> FREEDOM, FREEDOM IS GREAT,
BUT I DON'T POP UP ALONE IN BED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT GOING
I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT. I'M NOT ROLLING AROUND IN BED,
LOOK AT THE FREEDOM. I HAVE SO MUCH FREEDOM.
FREEDOM. >> COMICS DON'T GET CREDIT FOR
HIGH DEGREES OF DIFFICULTY. WHEN WE SEE CLEAN COMICS THAT
ARE SUPER FUNNY, WE REALIZE IT'S A HIGHER DEGREE OF DIFFICULTY.
>> I HAD TO CHEAT ON A TEACHER THAT I WAS DATING AND I WANTED
AN "A." HE WANTED AN "F."
YOU KNOW WHAT? I -- WE BOTH SETTLED FOR A "B."
>>> WELL THEY GOT THE DEEP DOWN DIRT, WE TURN TO THE NEW POWER
SUCK MODE. >> WHEN I STARTED WORKING WITH
TIM ALLEN ON HOME IMPROVEMENT, I HAD NEVER SEEN HIS ACT.
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT IT WAS. I ONLY NEW ONE THING.
I WAS SORT OF AMAZED THAT THE GUYS I WAS WORKING WITH BUILT A
SHOW AROUND IT, BUT THEY DID AND IT WAS GREAT.
>> HIS COMEDY WAS VERY, VERY SPECIFIC, AND IT CATERED TO THE
MAN. HE HAD A SET THAT WAS TAILOR
MADE FOR A POINT OF VIEW THAT WAS FOR TELEVISION.
BUT HE DID HAVE TO TONE IT DOWN. >> IT WAS ACTUALLY A VERY
UNCOMFORTABLE TRANSITION FROM TIM ALLEN THE COMEDIAN TO TIM
ALLEN THE ABC SITCOM STAR. I DON'T WORK WONDERFULLY CLEAN.
>> THE FIRST DAY TO SHRINK ON A MAN IN HIS REAL SCARE.
YOU WOULD IF YOU HAD THE BALLS, RIGHT?
LOOK AT THEM. DO YOU WANT TO SET OF THESE UGLY
****, I DON'T THINK SO. YEAH, I HAD SOME ELBOW SKIN LEFT
OVER. YEAH.
A MAJOR DESIGN PROBLEM HERE. >> TIM ALLEN.
>> WHEN I FIRST GOT "HOME IMPROVEMENT" I WAS SELLING OUT
LARGE VENUES PRIOR TO THAT, BUT AFTER THAT THE VENUES HAD TO GET
BIGGER. I HAD TO ALERT THE CROWD, YOU
SHOULDN'T BRING CHILDREN TO THIS.
I WALK OUT AND THE WHOLE FRONT ROW IS LIKE A GIRL SCOUT GROUP.
I THINK THE DAY IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER, YOU CAN BLOW A BUDDY
IF HE'S NOT FEELING GOOD ABOUT HIMSELF.
HEY, BUD, I'M SORRY ABOUT LOSING YOUR JOB, THAT WILL MAKE YOU
FEEL FUNNY. I REMEMBER THIS WONDERFUL WOMAN
SAYS, WE LOVED THE SHOW, LITTLE DIFFICULT EXPLAINING FALLATIO TO
A 9-YEAR-OLD. I SENT HER MONEY BACK.
>> HI, HONEY. YOU MAY NOT REMEMBER TODAY, BUT
IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE.
>> A LOT OF TIMES WITH SITCOMS, YOU BECOME THIS HOUSEHOLD NAME
AND SOMEBODY SEES YOU DIRTY AND YOU GO LIKE THIS.
>> I GOT MARRIED, MARRIED MY GIRLFRIEND OF SEVEN YEARS,
THAT'S HER AGE, I'M GOING TO JAIL.
>> LET'S SAY YOU KNOW HIM FROM "FULL HOUSE," THAT'S THE FATHER
FROM "FULL HOUSE," WE SHOULD TAKE THE KIDS AND GO TO THE
SHOW. YOU'LL SHOOT YOURSELF AT THE
FRONT TABLE. WHAT HAVE I DONE?
>> THANK YOU. >> WHEN PEOPLE SAW BOB A LOT.
THEY WERE LIKE -- >> I SEE PEOPLE'S FACES AND A
LOT OF NICE LADIES IN THE AUDIENCE ARE LIKE -- YOU JUST
KEEP YOUR MOUTH LIKE THAT, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.
>> HE LOVED IT. HE LOVED THAT THEY WERE THROWN
OFF. HE WAS FREE.
**** AND SUCK MY HUNDRED MILLION DOLLAR ****.
>> THAT'S THE PERFECT ROOM. YOU GET TO HAVE A TV SHOW, MAKE
SOME MONEY, BUT YOU ALSO GET TO DO STANDUP COMEDY AND BE WHO YOU
ARE. >> GREAT SUCCESS.
DOESN'T COME FOR EVERYBODY. THE LANDSCAPE IS STREWN WITH THE
BODIES OF STANDUPS WHO GOT TELEVISION DEALS AND IT JUST
DIDN'T WORK. >> MY BUTT IS REALLY SORE.
>> FROM WHEN THEY WERE PLAYING PIN THE TAIL ON THE HONKY.
>> THEY TRIED SITCOMS WITH DAVE CHAPPELL.
IT'S NOT JUST FINDING THE FUNNIEST PERSON WITH THE
FUNNIEST VOICE. IT'S NOT THAT EASY.
>> IS THERE SOMETHING I CAN HELP YOU WITH?
>> WOW, YOU LOOK COLD. >> IT IS TRICKY WHEN, AS A
COMEDIAN, YOU FIND YOUR VOICE, AND YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU WANT
TO TALK ABOUT AND THEY GIVE YOU A TV SHOW AND THEY'RE, LIKE,
YOU CAN'T TALK ABOUT ANYTHING THAT'S GOTTEN YOU TO THIS POINT.
>> I'M ALWAYS TRYING TO LOOK GOOD FOR GUYS, IT'S ALWAYS
BACKFIRING ON ME. YOU'RE ALWAYS ON A DIET.
I'M ON A DIET BECAUSE I'M TRYING TO GET THE BODY OF THE WOMEN YOU
JERK OFF TO AFTER I FALL ASLEEP. >> THE WHOLE REASON YOU GOT INTO
COMEDY IS BECAUSE YOU CAN SAY WHATEVER YOU WANT AND THEN YOU
GET ON TELEVISION AND YOU CAN ONLY SAY 2% OF WHAT YOU WANT.
>> YOU SAY IN THAT BED, A STORM OF SEXY IS GOING TO COME YOUR
WAY. SO JUST GET YOUR UMBRELLA.
>> AS A STANDUP COMIC YOU HAVE TO FIGURE OUT, CAN I STILL BE A
LARGE ENOUGH PERCENTAGE OF MYSELF IN THIS NETWORK FORMAT
THAT I CAN STILL BE EFFECTIVE DOING WHAT I DO?
>> IT'S NOTHING TO BE OVERLY CONCERNED ABOUT.
JUST WATCH YOUR WORDS. >> I DID THE BERNIE MACK SHOW ON
TELEVISION, THE BIGGEST THING I WAS COMPETING AGAINST WAS THE
COMEDIAN, HE'S FUNNY WHEN HE SAYS THINGS LIKE I DON'T GIVE A
**** ABOUT THESE MOTHER ****.
>> I'LL KICK A KID ASS, WHEN A KID GET 1 YEARS OLD --
>> BERNIE MACK THE COMEDIAN COULD BE AS DIRTY AS HE WANTED
TO BE. I COULDN'T DO THAT STUFF ON A
NETWORK TELEVISION SHOW. >> I WON'T LET GO.
>> YOU PROMISE? >> I PROMISE.
THIS IS YOUR UNCLE BERNIE, OKAY? >> I HAD TO GET THE ESSENCE OF
WHAT WAS FUNNY, BUT FIND A DIFFERENT WAY TO TELL THIS STORY
THAT WE COULD APPRECIATE HOW FUNNY HE REALLY IS, AND NOT
COMPETE AGAINST THAT STANDUP. >> YEAH, YEAH.
NO. BABY GIRL.
>> BERNIE MACK IS NOT SOMEBODY YOU WANT TO PLUG INTO ANY
SITCOM. MAKE SURE HE FEELS COMFORT NL,
NOT ALLOWED TO SWEAR OR ALLOWED TO BE AS BIG A PERSONALITY AS HE
WOULD BE ON STAGE, THAT HE STILL GETS TO DO ENOUGH OF WHAT HE
DOES FOR THE VIEWER AT HOME TO BE LIKE I LIKE THIS GUY.
I FEEL LIKE I'M GETTING AN AUTHENTIC EXPERIENCE HERE.
>> I TOLD YOU TELEVISION WAS NOT GOING TO CHANGE ME, AND IT
HASN'T. I STILL SHARE
>>> I CAME FROM AN INTERESTING BACKGROUND, I'M AN ONLY CHILD
AND BEING LATINO, YOU GUYS ARE THINKING THAT'S ETHNICALLY
IMPOSSIBLE. >> IN THE 70s AND 80s, A
COMEDIAN WORKED CLEAN HOPING TO GET A SPOT ON THE TONIGHT SHOW.
IF THE BOOKER FROM THE TONIGHT SHOW SAW YOU AND YOU WERE DIRTY,
YOU WERE OUT. >> I DON'T CARE HOW DIRTY A
COMIC, YOU WERE, YOU HAD TO HAVE YOUR FIVE MINUTES FOR JOHNNY
CARSON, MERV GRIFFIN. >> I HAVE A BACKGROUND, IRISH
AND GERMAN, THIN, ANGRY, HUNGRY PEOPLE.
>> THE GREAT CHEFS OF IRE RAND. >> TERRIFYING IS WHAT FIVE
MINUTES IS. IT'S A BIG DEAL FOR THE
POPULATION THAT LOVES STANDUP COMICS, THAT'S WHERE YOU SAW US.
>> WELCOME WHITNEY CUMMINGS. >> YOU HAVE TO FIGURE OUT FIVE
MINUTES, YOU'D BE CHANGING THINGS, OR FINDING SYNONYMS TO
VULGERIZE YOUR SET. >> NEXT WOMAN TO GET MARRIED,
CATCH THE BOUQUET, SEE IF ONE GUY TALKS TO YOU FOR THE REST OF
THE NIGHT. >> COMICS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A
HALLMARK OF OUR SHOW, AND ONE OF THE BIG CHALLENGES IS TRYING TO
FIGURE OUT, OKAY, THIS IS WORKING REALLY WELL IN THE
CLUBS. BUT WHEN YOU PUT A TELEVISION
LENS JUST A COUPLE OF FEET AWAY FROM THE PERFORMER, IT CAN FEEL
TOO ABRASIVE. IT'S TOO MUCH.
JIM GAFFIGAN. YOU CAN'T CURSE, YOU CAN'T TALK
ABOUT DRUGS. THERE WERE TIMES WHEN I WOULD
HAVE JOKES AND THERE WOULD BE LIKE, YOU CAN'T DO THAT JOKE
BECAUSE YOU SAY CRACK HEAD. AND I'M LIKE, I DID THIS JOKE IN
FRONT OF THE POPE A WEEK AGO. >> SOME PEOPLE DON'T LIKE
RELIGION JOKES, ESPECIALLY THE ONES GOING TO HELL.
BY THE WAY, TO MOST COMEDIANS, SAYING YOU CAN'T DO SOMETHING,
MIGHT AS WELL BE SAYING YOU SHOULD DO THIS.
THERE ARE PLENTY OF COMEDIANS WHERE THEY'RE LIKE JUST DON'T
CURSE, AND THEY'LL GO UP THERE AND CURSE IMMEDIATELY.
>> LEO WAS YOUR PHILIPINO -- FARKING TICKET.
I HAVE TO WRITE FOR YOU THE FARKING TICKET.
HE SAID, HE'S NOT -- HE'S MY -- --
>> A CLEAN COMIC IS A DREAM FOR ME BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE TO BEG
FOR A JOKE TO GET PASSED BY A NETWORK OR CROSS MY FINGERS AND
TOES AND WORRY ABOUT PEOPLE GETTING PISSED OFF.
THERE'S NO RULE BOOK ON A SHOW LIKE THE COLBERT SHOW.
EVERY DAY I'M FIGURING OUT WHAT WE CAN AND CAN'T DO AND THE
BOUNDARIES AND HOW FAR CAN WE GO?
>> WHY DID GAY GUYS GET TO CHOOSE WHO THE HOT WOMEN ARE.
I THOUGHT STRAIGHT GUYS GOT TO DECIDE.
YOU'RE LIKE, ALL RIGHT, AND THE TONY GOES TO -- ROCKY AGAIN.
IT'S A COMPLETELY SEPARATE TYPE OF COMEDY LATE NIGHT COMEDY.
SOME COMICS ARE GOOD AT IT. BUT SOME COMICS, IT FEELS LIKE
IT BECOMES TOO MUCH WORK TO CONSTRUCT YOUR THING FOR THAT
MEDIUM. >> HELLO?
>> RICHARD PRYOR WAS NEVER AS FUNNY ON THE TONIGHT SHOW AS HE
WAS DOING STANDUP. HE WAS GOOD, BUT THEY WERE NEVER
AS FUNNY. >> IT'S VERY RARE YOU SEE
SOMEONE'S FIVE MINUTES ON TV AND IT'S AS GOOD AS THEIR HOUR IN A
COMEDY CLUB. >> GUYS, IF YOU COULD BLOW
YOURSELVES, LADIES, YOU'D BE IN THIS ROOM ALONE RIGHT NOW.
WATCHING AN EMPTY STAGE. LIKE, I NEVER SAW BILL HICKS
LIVE, BUT I HAVE FIRSTHAND ACCOUNTS FROM FRIENDS SAYING,
THERE'S NO ONE BETTER. >> HE WAS BOOKED ON THE LATE
SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN IN 1993, AND HE DID HIS SET, WHICH
HAD BEEN APPROVED BY THE BOOKERS IN ADVANCE.
>> PEOPLE ANNOY ME. WHAT'S ANNOYING ME IS THESE
PRO-LIFE PEOPLE, YOU EVER LOOK AT THEIR FACES?
I'M PRO-LIFE. THEY DON'T LOOK IT, THEY JUST
EXUDE IT. YOU SEE THEM TRYING TO GO TO AN
ORPHANAGE TO ADOPT A KID. DON'T PICK ME.
>> DID FINE IN FRONT OF THAT AUDIENCE, AND THEN AFTER THE
SET, ROBERT MORTON, GOT ON THE PHONE, SOME CONFERENCE UPSTAIRS
AND THEY DECIDED TO CUT IT FROM THE EPISODE.
THEY SAID IT WAS TOO OFFENSIVE. >> THE BILL HICKS INCIDENT ON
LETTERMAN BECAME THE THING OF LEGEND.
SO WHEN WE TALK ABOUT CLEAN COMEDY AND DIRTY COMEDY, IT WAS
COMPLETELY WITHIN THE PARAMETERS OF WHAT IS ACCEPTABLE ON NETWORK
TELEVISION. >> IF THAT'S WHO YOU'RE BRINGING
ONTO YOUR SHOW, THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO GET.
IF YOU'RE NOT WANTING THAT, YOU'RE GOING TO GET, PROBABLY, A
TERRIBLE VERSION OF THAT PERSON. >> BILL HICKS FELT VIOLATED.
HE NEVER DID THE LETTERMAN SHOW AGAIN, AND IT HAUNTED DAVE.
>> I WANT YOU FOLKS TO ENJOY THIS, HONESTLY.
>> YEARS LATER, AFTER HICKS HAD DIED, LETTERMAN HAD HICKS' MOM
ON THE SHOW AND THEY PLAYED THE SET IN ITS ENTIRETY.
>> I THINK IT'S INTERESTING TO NOTE HOW PEOPLE ACT ON RELIGIOUS
BELIEFS, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? LIKE A LOT OF CHRISTIANS WEAR
CROSSES AROUND THEIR NECKS. NICE SENTIMENT.
DO YOU THINK WHEN JESUS COMES BACK HE'S REALLY GOING TO WANT
TO LOOK AT A CROSS? IT WAS TRAIL BLAZING, AND BILL
HICKS IS AMAZING, BUT SOMEBODY HAS TO BE FIRST AND YOU USUALLY
GET CHOPPED DOWN AND THE NEXT GUY COMES THROUGH.
THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED. >> I'VE NOT SEEN THAT VIDEOTAPE,
OR ANY PART OF IT SINCE THAT NIGHT, AND SEEING IT NOW, IT
RAISES THE QUESTION, WHAT WAS THE MATTER WITH ME?
WHAT WAS I THINKING? THAT WAS JUST TREMENDOUS.
>> LATE NIGHT TV IS NOT WHAT IT USED TO BE.
IT'S GREAT TO DO CONAN OR FALLON.
ALL GREAT, BUT THAT'S NOT GOING TO MAKE YOUR CAREER ANYMORE.
IF YOU WIND UP ON COMEDY CENTRAL NOW, YOU COULD WIND UP DOING A
HALF HOUR FOR NETFLIX, NETWORK TV NO LONGER CONTROLS WHO IS
FAMOUS. >> IT'S MORE ABOUT PODCASTS AND
THINGS THAT GET A BIGGER SENSE OF YOU THAN JUST LIKE, HOW YOU
DOING, FOLKS? WITH THE PODCASTS, IT GIVES THE
COMEDIAN, THE FREEDOM, THERE ARE NO RESTRICTIONS.
THEY'RE JUST TOPICS WE TALK ABOUT THAT ARE NORMALLY TABOO.
WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT, DADDY?
>> YOU SAID IT. >> ARE YOU GOOD TO YOUR MATE?
>> AND DO THEY RECIPROCATE? >> AND THE RESPONSE WE'RE
GETTING IS PEOPLE ARE SAYING, THANK YOU FOR BEING SO OPEN, AND
HONEST. >> THERE'S THE PREMIUM FOR THEM
TO BE COMPLETELY WHO THEY ARE, AND NOW AUDIENCES ARE MORE
FINELY TUNED TO SNIFF OUT THE BS.
I'M LISTENING TO MARK MARIN AND I KNOW HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS
FATHER WHEN HE GOES ON STAGE, THERE'S A SHORTHAND SO HE CAN GO
DEEPER FASTER. >> I DON'T THINK I'M AFRAID TO
DIE. I'D PREFER IT HAPPENS QUICKLY.
LIKE THE TRANSITION I JUST WANTED IT TO BE LIKE, BOOM,
BOOM, I'D LIKE MY LAST WORDS TO BE SOMETHING LIKE,
>>> TWO YEARS AGO I WAS ASKED TO PERFORM AT A CHARITY GOLF
TOURNAMENT IN NEW JERSEY AND I SAID YES BECAUSE I'M NOT AGAINST
CHARITY.
>> I'M NOT GOING TO **** CHARITY.
WHAT AM I? A MONSTER.
>> THE ONLY THING ABOUT BEING A CLEAN COMIC I THINK IS IT'S
OFTEN ASSOCIATED WITH CORPORATE EVENTS.
>> AS A PROFESSIONAL COMEDIAN, YOU HAVE TO LEARN IF YOU DO A
CORPORATE GIG, IT HAS TO BE CLEAN.
>> THEY SAY GET UP AND ENTERTAIN THESE PEOPLE BUT DON'T SAY
ANYTHING THAT WOULD BE ENTERTAINING AND THEN YOU GO ALL
RIGHT. YOU GO UP AND DO YOUR BEST.
YOU USUALLY FAIL AND THEN YOU LEAVE.
>> THE WOMAN IN CHARGE WALKS UP TO ME AND GOES OKAY, MIKE, THERE
IS TWO SPEAKERS AND THEN YOU. THE FIRST SPEAKER WALKS ON AND
HE'S AN 11-YEAR-OLD BOY WHO SURVIVED LEUKEMIA.
I KNOW.
>> HE'S NOT FUNNY AT ALL. >> STANDUP IS A STRUGGLE.
THE START OF YOUR CAREER. EVENTUALLY, IF YOU'RE FUNNY YOU
WILL MAKE MONEY. IT'S JUST A LONG GAME BUT A
CORPORATE GIG CAN BE A PAYCHECK. >> IF YOU WANT TO MAKE A LOT OF
MONEY DOING LIVE STANDUP, IT'S IN CORPORATE AND COLLEGES SO YOU
GOT TO WORK CLEAN IF YOU WANT THE BIG BUCKS.
>> YOU HAVE TO MAKE THE CALCULATION, AM I A SELLOUT OR
OR BUSINESSMAN. >> LIKE TESTING A BATTERY.
>> I'M TOO DIRTY TO DO CORPORATE AND IT'S AMAZINGLY UNFORTUNATE
BECAUSE THERE IS A LOT OF MONEY IN CORPORATE.
BELIEVE ME, I WOULD DO IT IN A SECOND IF I COULD.
>> I DID A VERY CONSERVATIVE JEWISH RESTAURANT.
THEY HAD THIS WHOLE LIST OF WORDS THAT YOU COULDN'T SAY, ONE
OF WHICH WAS TOOKIS. I'M LIKE WHAT?
>> THEY ARE TRYING TO HELP THE COMEDIAN BY SAYING DON'T BE TOO
DIRTY, DON'T BE TOO OFFENSIVE BECAUSE WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN
IS YOU'RE GOING TO SAY A QUESTIONABLE JOKE ABOUT
SEXUALITY AND THEN STEVE FROM FINANCE IS GOING TO LAUGH SO
HARD THAT IT'S GOING TO BE AWKWARD TO WORK WITH STEVE FOR
THE REST OF THE YEAR AND HE'S GOING TO BE FIRED.
>> I WAS READING A BIBLE AND FOUND OUT JESUS HAD A LITTLE
BROTHER. ANYBODY KNOW HIS NAME?
JAMES. WHEN I READ THAT I WAS LIKE HOW
MUCH PRESSURE WAS THAT? JESUS, YOUR BIG BROTHER?
HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU HAVE TO HEAR WHY CAN'T YOU BE MORE LIKE
JESUS JAMES? >> THERE IS A SPECIFIC CHURCH
CIRCUIT COMEDIANS WHO THEMSELVES ARE CHRISTIAN WHO PERFORM IN
CHRISTIAN VENUES. >> BECAUSE A LOT OF PEOPLE GO I
WANT TO GO SEE HIM BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE OFFENDED.
YOU HAVE SOMEBODY COMING TO YOUR CHURCH, NOW THEY ARE IN THEIR
COMFORT ZONE AND ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS DO YOUR SHOW AND TALK
ABOUT STUFF THAT'S NOT OFFENSIVE AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, YOU GOT
ANOTHER FAN OF COMMAEDYCOMEDY. >> SHAUNDA PIERCE, KNOWN AS
CLEAN OF CLEAN. >> I HAVE TEN OR 12 GOLD RECORDS
AND SIX PLATINUM RECORDS AND YOU CAN'T FIND A CUSS WORD ON ANY OF
THEM UNLESS BUTT CRACK IS. >> I TELL MY FRIENDS, YOU THINK
YOU'RE FUNNY, COME TO FIRST BAPTIST AND MAKE A BUNCH OF
DEACONS LAUGH ON EASTER MORNING. WE'LL SEE HOW FUNNY YOU ARE.
>> IT'S NOT THAT I MADE A MORAL CONSCIOUS TO NOT CUSS, IT DIDN'T
EXIST IN MY VOCABULARY SO WHEN I SEE A COMIC GET UP WITH THOSE
WORDS, MAYBE JUST THE WAY THEY WERE RAISED.
YOU NEED TO GO SLAP THEIR MAMA, NOT THEM.
>> MY MOTHER CAME IN MY BEDROOM.
I WAS 23, THE NIGHT BEFORE I GOT MARRIED.
SHE CAME IN AND SAID WELL, TOMORROW IS YOUR BIG DAY.
I GUESS IT'S TIME WE HAD THAT LITTLE TALK.
AND SHE WOULD ALWAYS SPELL IT, S- E-X.
>> THIS IS WHAT I SAY EVERY NIGHT, IF I SAY SOMETHING ABOUT
SEX, SORRY IF THAT OFFENDED YOU. IF YOU'RE HERE, I'M PRETTY SURE
SOMEBODY IN YOUR PAST HAD SEX. AND SO IF YOU THROW THAT MIRROR
UP OF HOW RIDICULOUS THEIR OFFENSE IS, THEN THAT GIVES YOU
THE PERMISSION TO GO TO THE NEXT STEP AND THE NEXT STEP.
WE GOT DEACONS FROWNING ON US BECAUSE WE'RE TAKING
ANTI-DEPRESSANTS AND THEY GOT I IING AI
IING A RAI VIAGRA SITTING IN THEIR POCKET.
>> THERE IS THIS BELIEF SHOULD WE LOOK AROUND, SHOULD WE BE
OFFENDED? THERE IS A NICE FREEDOM TO THAT.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHY ANYONE WOULD WANT TO BE THE PRESIDENT OF THE
UNITED STATES. I WOULDN'T WANT THAT JOB IN A
MILLION YEARS. CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING AWAKENED
EVERY MORNING LIKE THIS. PROBLEMS.
>> BRIAN REGAN MAKES A GOOD CHUNK OF HIS MONEY BECAUSE HE'S
A FAMILY ACT AND THAT COMMUNITY COMES OUT.
>> YOU GUYS ARE GREAT. >> IF A FAMILY CAN COME SEE A
SHOW AND LAUGH TOGETHER, THE MORE RELATABLE I CAN MAKE MY
SHOW, THE MORE IT WILL HIT HOME WITH FANS.
>> I TOOK MY FAMILY ON AN R. V. TRIP THIS SUMMER.
I THOUGHT IT STOOD FOR RECREATIONAL VEHICLE, NO RUIN
VACATION. >> THERE IS A DEGREE WHICH
COMEDY CAN BREAK US ALL APART AND MAKE PEOPLE AT EACH OTHER'S
THREATS AND IT UNITES PEOPLE LAUGHING ABOUT SOMETHING THEY
DIDN'T EXPECT TO LAUGH AT. >> DID YOU HIT TRAFFIC COMING IN
TONIGHT? SOME OF YOU.
I HIT LIKE TWO CARS. I --
>> WHEN WE LAUGH TOGETHER, THERE IS SOMETHING THAT'S HEALING.
YOU JUST DON'T FEEL SO ALONE. THERE IS NOTHING COMPARABLE.
>> IF YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE A CASE FOR CLEAN COMEDY, MY CASE
IS IT CAN APPEAL TO KIDS THAT ARE 10 AND YOUR GRANDFATHER THAT
IS 90 AND THEY CAN BE IN THE SAME ROOM AND LAUGH AT THE SAME
TIME. THAT SEEMS LIKE A GOOD THING.
>> THE MORE WELL-CHOSEN YOUR WORDS ARE, THE BETTER THE WORK
IS. >> OKAY, I CAN'T SAY THIS WORD
BUT CAN I SAY THIS? >> LET'S TALK ABOUT CAULK, THE
STUFF AROUND YOUR BATHTUB. THERE ISN'T A WOMAN THAT WANTS
FRESH, FIRM CAULK IN HER BATHROOM.
>> DO YOU REALLY? I DON'T.
I DON'T LIKE HAVING TO TIPTOE AROUND ADULT WORDS.
>> SOME OF THEM ARE ****. WE NEED THESE.